Lance Berkman

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?RAND=1

Lance Berkman
Jew Score: 5 I0 O1 K4	February 10, 1976 — Here's an odd one. Apparently, some people out there think Houston Astros' superstar Lance Berkman might be Jewish. Not to give away the big surprise or anything, but he's not. Mistaken Judaism happens all the time, of course, and usually it's pretty clear why. Not this time. Is the name Berkman Jewish-sounding? Even if it were, isn't the whole theory out the window with a name like Lance? After all, even the world's best bagel is verboten once you throw a huge hunk of bacon on it. He's over six feet tall, weighs over 220 pounds, grew up in rural Texas, loves ballroom dancing, and is nicknamed Fat Elvis. How is this man even remotely Jewish? Need we go on? The only reason to assume Lance Berkman is Jewish is that he's awesome and since Judaism is awesome, too, they simply belong together. It's a stretch, but hey, it makes about as much sense as the idea that Lance Berkman is Jewish in the first place. Verdict: Not a Jew.

Dr. Seuss

Jew or Not Jew: Dr. Seuss

(Theodor Seuss Geisel)
March 2, 1904 – September 24, 1991

Will Sam not consume Green Eggs and Ham because it's trefe?

Is the Cat wearing a Hat in lieu of a yarmulke?

Did Horton hear a who, lay an egg, and ask why this night is different from all other nights?

These and many other questions will have to remain unanswered, because, despite multiple rumors to the contrary, Dr. Seuss is not a Jew.

He obviously sympathized with the cause, a la inaugural JONJ entry Charlie Chaplin, but that's as far as it goes.

So much for Seuss. A mensch? Certainly. A goy? Undoubtedly.

Verdict: ... not a Jew.